https://youtu.be/LwrQXI4_mgo I don't go to therapy to find out if I'm a freak I go and I find the one and only answer every week And it's just me and all the memories to follow Down any course that fits within a fifty minute hour And we fathom all the mysteries, explicit and inherent When … Continue reading What do you hear in these sounds?
Dear Carrie, Thank you for the long, relaxing bath by candlelight and music; I know your anxiety was feeling overwhelming tonight. You're so stressed after not working for 3 years, you doubt yourself and your natural initiative. Thank you for putting in the time and money to renew your Pharmacy Tech license. I know you … Continue reading Love letter to myself
I've been suffering from writer's block for a while, mostly because of the numbness I've been feeling ever since I started taking the antipsychotic, Latuda. It feels like all the remaining life force I had has been sucked out of me. It did its job by silencing any hint of hypomania, though. What it's left … Continue reading Writer’s block
I just observed that it's been over a month since I last posted an original writing. This may be the longest stretch of depression, absent of any significant hypomania, since I was re-diagnosed bipolar in April. This, despite the dosages of my medications being increased on a monthly basis. I met someone last night who … Continue reading When it won’t stop raining
In the funny way that life happens, I lapsed back onto alcohol the night of August 5th, just five days shy of my one year "soberversary." Misfires in our brain may cause misfires in our lives, but they need not be permanent. Seeing these misfires as opportunities for growth doesn't happen right away and sometimes … Continue reading Abandonment wounds and the recovery process
I haven't worked since May 2016. It is not the first time in my adult history that I have been so disabled for so long. When I was fired for absenteeism from my first job in 2008, I wasn't able to stabilize (and get lucky again) until 2011. From May 2011 to January 2015, I … Continue reading The limitations of Bipolar Disorder
I'm a bookworm. A voracious reader. I wouldn't know how to write if I didn't read. Here are 12 books that have played the biggest role in helping me navigate my depression and subsequent existentialism. I highly recommend them and hope they will benefit someone's life, too. DEPRESSION AND FINDING MEANING The Noonday Demon: An … Continue reading 12 books that have helped my depression