Bipolar in Order: Advocating for the Mentally Ill
Musings on mental health, mental illness, life, love, and philosophy
Just because I talk faster than I think doesn't mean I didn't hear and understand you. By all means, tell me I'm not finished, I don't want to talk over you. I'm trying. I'm doing better. I want this to last. Have faith. I will do everything in my power not to miss 2 days … Continue reading Recovering from abandonment issues and C-PTSD with bipolar disorder
TLDR; missed medications, withdrawal, new relationship We've spent about 7 or 8 days together now and he still wants me. I stayed up at his house for an extra 2 days for the sake of his doggy and me not wanting to make him drive that hour and back with his herniated discs. That was … Continue reading I’ll never be loved again. That’s a lie.
I have come so far and I'm finally able to really own my progress. I'm proud of Carrie. I stay away from booze, and if I slipped it was for a very brief period. I'm a month and a half away from a YEAR again. I'm still alive. I came very close to taking myself … Continue reading Bipolar in order
https://youtu.be/1LE0LPBnFfg "Hypomania (literally "under mania" or "less than mania") is a mood state characterized by persistent disinhibition and mood elevation (euphoria), with behavior that is noticeably different from the person's typical behavior when in a non-depressed state. It may involve irritability, but less severely than full mania. According to DSM-5 criteria, hypomania is distinct from … Continue reading Hypomania: Personal anecdotes
"Please be careful with me; I'm sensitive, and I'd like to stay that way." — Jewel Ever since I can remember, I've been called "too sensitive." "Don't take everything so personally," they'd say. "They" didn't realize I was taking on "them." I was a mirror; I unconsciously reflected who they were back to them. "One … Continue reading My experience as an empath
The Three Pillars of Loneliness 1. Separation 2. Shame 3. Fear HIGHLIGHTS Part I: The Pillar of Separation "The exact opposite vibration of love is fear." § "There is only one type of pain in this Universe and it is separation; there is only one kind of happiness in this Universe and it is unity." … Continue reading Book: The Anatomy of Loneliness by Teal Swan
https://youtu.be/GGorABGw418 Quotes from the video from Teal Swan "You refuse to cut your losses." [Wow. This might be the best description of depression I've ever seen.] "Whatever you resist, persists." "You're committed to a dead end." "Why would I scream if there's no one near to hear me?" "Basically you're aware that these little things … Continue reading Futility and depression are synonymous
When I was 10, I was a Spice Girls fanatic (Geri especially). I was already on the Internet by now. I got into the school spelling bee but forgot the second "t" in otter. I'd always been reading a lot, and well. My brother and I played with the video camera a lot when we … Continue reading Significant times from my past
Sometimes it seems that no matter what I do or say it’s the wrong thing. I mean well, but I feel at times that I am judged unfairly. And feeling that I am just better off being alone
most of the time. I like some people but even the ones I love fall short when I need them. I talk too loud, I laugh too loud, I say more than I should but none of this is on purpose. I am who I am and I can’t change
that. Either accept me and quit criticizing me or just let me be to myself. I thought I had good relationships with my family but I think I am overstating that with a few of them. I can live with myself and I can take care
of myself. Asking for favors is no longer an option with one of my family members…
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I wanted to use these articles to help educate both myself and others about this distressing, unpredictable feature of bipolar disorder. It has come to my attention because of the unique state I've been experiencing lately. Sometimes I feel [hypo]manic, then I can be triggered into depression, but I can also experience what seems to … Continue reading Mixed affective state 🎭
