I haven't worked since May 2016. It is not the first time in my adult history that I have been so disabled for so long. When I was fired for absenteeism from my first job in 2008, I wasn't able to stabilize (and get lucky again) until 2011. From May 2011 to January 2015, I … Continue reading The limitations of Bipolar Disorder
You are not alone dealing with a mental illness, and your feelings, mood states, and physical manifestations are valid.
I’m living with a mental illness, and sometimes that can cause people to verbally tiptoe around me, especially the people closest to me. It’s like my friends and loved ones are stuck walking on eggshells sometimes, and I want that to stop.
I recently published a blog titled “10 ‘Harmless Things’ You Say That Hurt Me”. In that post I described what living with Bipolar Disorder and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder can be like, and I shared some extremely hurtful things people have said to me. In that post I asked for kindness, awareness, and acceptance, which I received. But then I realized something really important: in that post I shared things I didn’t want people to say, but I failed to offer advice on what to say. So, I’m doing that now.
So, I guess you could call this the follow-up. In this post I’ll be sharing 10 reassuring…
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I’m letting my heart spill out through my keyboard… metaphorically, of course, and I’m offering it all to you. Today, I’m going to talk about my mental health. This is something that I’ve worked to conceal for a long time, mostly because of the negative stigma attached to mental illness. I’m sharing for two main reasons; (1) to educate people, and (2) to show people like me that they are not alone.
For the record: I’m living with Bipolar Disorder and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder… In this post I’m sharing 10 “harmless things” that people have said to me that actually cause me a great deal of pain. I’m also sharing how they make me feel, and why, while giving you an inside look at my life.
So, these are the things I wish you wouldn’t say to me;
“You don’t look like you have a mental illness.”
More commonly stated as…
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I'm a bookworm. A voracious reader. I wouldn't know how to write if I didn't read. Here are 12 books that have played the biggest role in helping me navigate my depression and subsequent existentialism. I highly recommend them and hope they will benefit someone's life, too. DEPRESSION AND FINDING MEANING The Noonday Demon: An … Continue reading 12 books that have helped my depression
That's the thing that people who don't live with depression don't understand. You aren't some caricature of a "suicidal person" wallowing in sadness and contemplating ending your life, as much as you are an exhausted person who has been so drained of hope, that you now believe the lie that your mind tells you that … Continue reading Finding One Reason to Keep Living (Fighting Depression)
I vow to never take another SSRI, no matter what! I will handle my chronic pain and depression/ anxiety in other ways. In my opinion, Cymbalta, and the withdrawal, is worse than the disease for which I took it.
I have a chronic pain condition. It came out of nowhere. I didn’t even know the condition existed. Similar to fibromyalgia, it is specific to certain parts of the body instead of widespread. I was prescribed Cymbalta by a doctor at a prestigious Pain Management Clinic. Cymbalta worked immediately. I was happy to resume a normal life, pain-free.
A few months later I began to feel dizzy. Then weak. There was a constant low-grade headache. (We won’t even talk about constipation.) I ignored the malaise until one day when I nearly ended up in the hospital. I had been working hard, exerting myself, something I don’t usually do. I thought…
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I went through with it, after all. This is my first time doing spoken word poetry. I can't believe how natural it ended up being for me despite my social anxiety. https://youtu.be/W5X0Ji3jHew
Depression is not sadness; it is being buried in dreams of anxiety and pain It is staring at the same page of a book and not even hearing the rain Depression is not sadness; it is wanting someone there but having nothing to say It is not feeling the wind on a cool breezy day … Continue reading Purgatory, a poem about depression